Lawyer Jokes and Cartoons

How do you tell if it is REALLY cold outside?

admin — Thu, 08 Apr 2010 04:52:47 +0000

How do you tell if it is REALLY cold outside?

A lawyer has his hands in his own pockets

How can you spot a lawyer or politician walking down the street?

admin — Thu, 08 Apr 2010 04:51:21 +0000

How can you spot a lawyer or politician walking down the street?

He will have his hands in someone else’s pockets.

Who Pays for Workers Compensation Benefits in Illinois?

admin — Fri, 22 Jan 2010 03:47:12 +0000

According to the Illinois Workers Compensation Laws, the employer is who is responsible for paying for workers’ compensation. In Illinois, most employers will buy commercial insurance to cover workers’ compensation and then the insurance company will pay for the benefits on behalf of the employer. The workers’ compensation benefits and insurance premiums can not be charged to the employee. If the employer does not buy commercial workers compensation insurance, they will typically obtain approval from the state to self-insure.

If the employee wants to find out who is responsible for paying his/her benefits, he/she can check the employer’s workplace notice or the Illinois Worker’s Compensation Commission web site, or contact the Illinois Workers Compensation Commission Insurance Compliance Division (866-352-3033). You can also get questions answered by an Illinois Workers Compensation Attorney here.

Are Illinois Workers’ Compensation Benefits Considered Income?

admin — Fri, 22 Jan 2010 03:37:36 +0000

Illinois workers’ compensation benefits are NOT considered as income. These benefits are NOT taxable under federal law or under Illinois state law. Workers compensation benefits do not need to be reported as income on federal or state tax returns. You can obtain more information from a Chicago Worker’s Compensation Lawyer here.

What benefits are provided by the Illinois Workers Compensation Laws?

admin — Sun, 17 Jan 2010 16:46:26 +0000

The Illinois Workers compensation laws provide benefits in several categories.
1. The medical treatments “reasonably” needed to correct the problems resulting from the injury.
2. Temporary Total Disability (TTD) benefits during the time the employee is taking time off from work and recovering from their injury
3. Temporary Partial Disability (TPD) benefits during the time that the employee is still recovering by is working “light duty”.
4. Vocational rehabilitation / maintenance benefits are given to a worker who was injury that is taking part in an approved rehabilitation program
5. Permanent Partial Disability (PPD) benefits for workers who incurred a permament disfigurement or disability but can still work.
6. Permament Total Disability (PTD) benefits for workers who permanently can no longer work
7. Death Benefits to family members

What injuries and diseases are covered by the Illinois Workers Compensation laws?

admin — Fri, 01 Jan 2010 22:04:14 +0000

In most instances, the Illinois Workers Compensation Laws cover any injury that is caused in part or entirely as a result of the person’s job. Someone who has an injury as a result of repetitive use, such as carpal tunnel syndrome, or back injuries from their work, or even a heart attack while at work. Essentially, any injury that occurs while at work is covered under the Illinois Workers Compensation Laws.

If the person has an illness not related to their work, they can still get benefits if the work makes their illness worse. Of course, the worker would have to show that the work made the pre-existing illness worse.

There are a few situations that clearly are not covered. If you happen to be attending a company sponsored recreational event, such as a golf outing or a company party, and you get injured, you will not be covered unless you were required to attend by your company. Also not covered are accidental injuries that happen while a patient in a drug or alcohol rehabilitation program.

If you have further questions and you are from the Chicago area, you should consult a Chicago Workmans Compensation Attorney.

This information is adapted from the Illinois Workers Compensation and Occupational Diseases Handbook.

Who is covered by the Illinois Workers Compensation Laws?

admin — Fri, 01 Jan 2010 21:47:27 +0000

The Illinois Workers Compensation laws cover almost all workers that are hired in Illinois, injured in Illinois (while working) or whose company is based in the state of Illinois. Anyone who is hired, injured, or whose company is based in Illinois is covered by these laws from the time they start that job. So, basically, if you work in Illinois you are covered. You are covered if you are working in Illinois when you become injured. You are also covered if your company is based in Illinois.

Who Administers the Illinois Workers Compensation Program?

admin — Wed, 30 Dec 2009 01:58:10 +0000

According to the State of Illinois website, the state legislature created an agency in 1913 designed to resolve disagreements between employers and their injured workers. This agency had always been called the Illinois Industrial Commission; however, effective January 1, 2005, the agency was renamed the Illinois Workers’ Compensation Commission. I have no idea why it was renamed – I can’t find an explanation. It apparently has had different names in the past. The Commission acts as the administrative court system, and has to be impartial. There are staff who work for the commission who can answer questions about procedures and explain the basics of the law, but they will not act on behalf of either the employer or the employee.

As I’m summarizing this information I find on the Illinois Workers Compensation Commission website, I’m realizing that the information doesn’t really seem particularly useful. Hopefully soon I’ll get to the material that actually explains whether you need a workmans’ compensation attorney to handle your issues.

Illinois Workers Compensation Law Information – the Truth?

admin — Tue, 29 Dec 2009 05:09:57 +0000

(This post is not a joke and is not meant to be satire!)

I’ve started to do a little research on Workers Compensation Law. If you do a quick google search, you’ll find that there are a gazillion sites out there for lawyers with information saying you need to contact them right away for assistance. They claim that if you try to handle your case without a lawyer, you are just playing into the hands of the insurance companies.You would think with the accuracy of Google with finding information, it shouldn’t be too hard to find out if you really do need a lawyer to navigate the system. Unfortunately, I found out the information was not so readily available.

Being from Illinois, I did find some basic Illinois Workers Comp information. Well – the information isn’t that basic – in fact, I might need a lawyer just to sort it out. I figure I’ll slowly go through the information and try to digest it and put some here in understandable bites. To start with, what exactly is workers’ compensation?

From what I was able to gather, workers’ compensation is what we call the laws the explain the benefits workers get who have injuries or disease caused by their work. According to the wording I could find, the worker gets these benefits no matter whose fault the injury is. Each state has different laws related to workers’ compensation. As I am mostly interested in Illinois Workers’ Compensation Laws, according to the information I found, the first Illinois Workers Compensation laws were drafted in 1912. These laws have been around a long time (by my standards).

Hopefully as I make my way through all of this information, I can post some useful updates here. Check back to see if I’ve made any progress!

How many lawyers does it take to change a light bulb?

admin — Mon, 28 Dec 2009 04:07:50 +0000

How many lawyers does it take to change a light bulb?

Fifty four. Eight to argue, one to get a continuance, one to object, one to demur, two to research precedents, one to dictate a letter, one to stipulate, five to turn in their time cards, one to depose, one to write interrogatories, two to settle, one to order a secretary to change the bulb, and twenty-eight to bill for professional services.