Why did God make snakes just before lawyers?
To practice.
Dec 27
How do you get a lawyer out of a tree?
Cut the rope.
Dec 27
Do you know how to save a drowning lawyer?
Take your foot off his head.
Dec 27
Do you know how to save a drowning lawyer?
No? Good!
Dec 27
What’s the difference between a lawyer and a bucket of pond scum?
The bucket.
Dec 27
What’s the difference between a lawyer and a catfish?
One is a slimy, bottom dwelling, scum sucker. The other is a fish.
Dec 27
What do you call a smiling, sober, courteous person at a bar association convention?
The caterer.
Dec 27
Why are lawyers like nuclear weapons?
If one side has one, the other side has to get one.
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Why are lawyers like nuclear weapons?
Once launched, they can’t be recalled.
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Why are lawyers like nuclear weapons?
When they land, they prevent anything from functioning for the next hundred years.
Dec 27
How many lawyer jokes are there?
Just two, all the rest are true.
Dec 27
What’s the difference between a lawyer and a trampoline?
You take off your shoes before you jump on a trampoline.
